Season 8 – Episode 6: How to Get Off Notes (Without Memorizing!)

We’ve all done it.

Sat at our desk, typing out an opening statement word-for-word, hoping it’ll somehow click once we’re standing in court.

But here’s the thing: The way you practice is the way you’ll perform.

And if you’re only rehearsing in your head, hunched over a keyboard, your brain’s gonna BAIL on you the moment you stand up.

In this week’s podcast episode, I’m breaking down how to FINALLY get off your notes and deliver an opening that’s confident, conversational, and compelling.

I’m giving you:

🗒️A better way to practice (yes, it’s awkward…at first)

🗒️My 5-step process to ditch the script

🗒️And a whole lot of tough love (you know I can’t help myself 😉)

You DO NOT need to memorize your opening.

You NEED to internalize it.

Tune in NOW! 🎧

Love,
Sari 💖

P.S. Spots for the Opening Masterclass (Nov 13–14) are filling up FAST. Lock in your spot NOW.

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“The thing you must understand is that you’re not just delivering words. You’re delivering you. If you haven’t practiced your opening out loud—if you haven’t stood in your body, heard your own voice, felt your own fear, worked through it—you won’t connect. The jury will sense the dissonance. And that’s why typing your opening and calling it done is a mistake. The practice is the performance. You’ve got to embody it before you ever walk into court.”
sari de la motte

TRANSCRIPTION

Well the last time I checked, you are not going to deliver your opening statement to a jury from behind a desk. You're listening to Sari Swears on the Sari Swears podcast. Well, welcome everyone to another episode of Sari Swears and thank you. Yes, I am looking very fabulous today. Remember, if you want to watch the podcast, you can do that at youtube.com/@Saridlm, S-A-R-I-D-L-M like de la Motte. I also want to tell you that we have a brand new Command the Courtroom coming up. Well, brand new, we've done opening before, but we have another one coming up in November, November 13th through 14th. You can go to SariSwears.com and sign up for that. Remember, it's only 12 people here in our brand new Mary Cogan memorial courtroom and you can expense it to a case, so there's no reason why you shouldn't be going and doing that.

So if you want to come and learn all of the things in opening, opening is the other side of the trial dialogue, which I've talked about before which is, you have your voir dire, where you're asking juror questions. And opening, where you're answering them. And voir dire, where you're listening and opening, where you're talking. And so they are two halves of a whole, so if you've either been out to the voir dire, you definitely need to come to the opening. And if you haven't done voir dire, that's fine too. You can do them out of order. So only 12 seats, November 13th and 14th go to SariSwears.com to sign up for that.

Okay, so let's talk today about how to get off of notes because this is a big one. I get asked this a lot. In fact, I was asked this by one of my mastermind clients and my masterminds are the three attorneys that I work with over the course of a year. And he said to me a couple of months ago, "Sari, how do I get off of notes?" And I said, "Don't make them in the first place." And of course he was confused and you may be confused because you're like, wait, what?

But to understand what I mean, let's talk about neuro pathways. Neuro pathways, we know about the brain that it is very malleable, that we can create new neuro pathways. And the number one way that we create new neuro pathways or reinforce old ones is through repetition. So every time that you sit behind a desk and you type up your opening word-for-word, you are strengthening that neuro pathway. And you might think, well, what's wrong with that Sari? Well, the last time I checked, you are not going to deliver your opening statement to a jury from behind a desk. That's what the problem is with it. Y'all wonder why you have such a problem with actually doing it away from the notes and it's because you've never done it away from the notes, so of course your brain freaks out and is like this is new, what the hell?

And it's trying to remember all the things that you were typing out and did I say it the exact way that I was supposed to say it when I typed it out? And we don't want to create that neuro pathway at all. Now you've already created it, you have it, but we don't want to reinforce it and we especially don't want to reinforce it with all of your upcoming cases. So in today's podcast we're going to talk about why you shouldn't create that neuro pathway and how it benefits you not to. And second, what are you supposed to do instead? If you're not typing away at your desk, your opening word-for-word, then what are you supposed to be doing? I got you. Your Finnish mama has you. All right, so if we're not creating our opening sitting behind a laptop, typing it out word-for-word, what are we doing?

Well, I don't want to shock you, but what we're doing is, wait for it, standing up. That's the first thing that I want you to do. I want you to literally get on your feet and before I walk you through the process, let's talk about the three big benefits. And there are more than three. Actually, I think I wrote down more than three. There's five that I wrote down, but there's more than five benefits to actually creating anything really. But today we're talking about your opening on your feet. It's true for closing or any COE that maybe you are doing as well. So the first thing or the first benefit of creating on your feet and not behind a desk is that you are more creative on your feet. You're more creative. Actually, I have five things that are more creative. There really are three things I was looking at my notes wrong.

You are more creative when you are on your feet for a couple of reasons. When you're standing, walking around doing that whole kind of thing, you have, I mean this is just physiological, you have increased blood flow and increased blood flow equals more oxygenated blood and more oxygenated blood equals brain fuel. So when you're sitting, you are literally not as creative as when you are standing. In fact, physiologically, when you are moving, and we know this from exercise for example, it releases, your body releases the feel-good chemicals like dopamine and serotonin and those things make you feel good, and when you feel good you tend to be more creative. All of the suffering artist's thing aside, all right? In addition to that, when you're standing moving, you're stimulating growth of new brain cells. Literally you are stimulating, we kill brain cells through smoking, through drinking, but when you are moving, exercising, walking, or literally just standing and moving about with your opening statement, you are stimulating growth of new brain cells, especially in the hippocampus.

I think that's how you say it. Hippocampus, which is the place in your brain that stores memory and imagination, so that's going to help you be more creative. Now, movement also helps you create new and different ideas literally, and I think this is so interesting, creating new neuro, I'm sorry, creating a new perspective. Literally, I have a friend that always teased me when I first became a speaker that I would use the word literally all the time, and I didn't actually mean literally, so she was like, stop using literally. This is for you Linda, I've stopped. But I am literally meaning that when you actually stand up, you see things in a different way. In my seminars like for example, Command the Courtroom, I will have everybody sit next to someone different at a different place. We don't do a lot of sitting in Command the Courtroom, we're standing most of the time, but when we start for example or when we come back from lunch, I'll have them sit somewhere different when we talk about what they're learning.

And the reason for that is just literally being in a different place in the room allows their brain to kind of open up more space to learn because they're literally, there we are again, seeing the room, seeing me, seeing the flip charts, seeing each other from a different perspective. One of my favorite books, that's an oldie now, but it was Ellen Langer's book, what's it called? I think it's called The Power of Mindful Learning, and she did this research study where they looked at students who were learning, let's say timelines. Remember those in history, the timelines, you have to remember what happened when and memorize dates and all the things. Hopefully they don't do that anymore, but they looked at one group of students that sat at their desks learning timelines, and then they looked at another group that actually the teacher had gone and wrote the timeline on the ground with tape and different visuals.

And as the students looked at the timeline, they walked up and down the timeline and then they tested them and the students that had done the walking and looking at the timeline versus sitting at their desk and being lectured at, as you can imagine, did much, much better in the remembering of the facts. So actually getting a different perspective by being on your feet is going to open up more creativity. There was a 2014 Stanford University study that said creative input increases 60% while walking. So yeah, maybe you're not walking as you're creating, maybe I hope you do. I hope you take breaks. In fact, that's another thing we do here. We're on a beautiful riverfront. We tell our people to walk during lunch and we tell people when they come in for trial consulting to walk, you'll be more creative. Stanford's proven it when you're walking, when you're moving, you are 60% more creative even if you come back and sit, it continues that creativity.

So the first benefit of creating on your feet is that you are more creative, literally. The second benefit is it creates muscle memory for your opening. When you sit and type and then you get up like the weekend before to try it out, your brain is freaking out because your body is literally a storage of memory, especially muscle memory. The way I always explain muscle memory is think about any time that you've gotten up from your living room per se, and you walk into the kitchen and you forget what it is that you were trying to get in the kitchen, what do you have to do? You have to go all the way back into the living room and then you're ah, now I remember because location holds memory and muscle memory is exactly that. It remembers the things that you are doing versus the things that you're reading.

In fact, we know that muscle memory is way better memory than just cognitive memory, so if you want to create memory of your opening where you're like, oh my god, I'm going to be out there and I'm going to forget what I'm saying, start by creating it in the first place with your muscles, not with your fingertips typing, right. I remember when another one of my masterminds when they were out here for their trial lab back in August and we were about to go in front of a mock jury and we just changed all of their openings right before we're about to go because that's what we like to do around here, not on purpose, but we just come up with good ideas when we come up with good ideas, even if it's right before a mock jury.

And he was back in one of our empty offices and later when we were debriefing and he did great, but he said, I wish I would have spent the time going through it on my feet as much as possible versus trying to write cheat sheet notes to myself because I was afraid I was going to forget. He said, in fact, when we were talking about this just on our group call this week that he had probably never done the last three parts of the nine part template. And I said, that's so much like when I was playing piano as a child or I was teaching piano or all my time in music, is that you know the first 75% of most of your songs the best because you keep playing until you come to a hard part and then you're like, oh, let me just start back at the beginning and you play through again. So he was like, it was so great to actually be on my feet and doing it and now I know what I want it to look like.

So it creates that muscle memory and that really brings us to the third benefit, which when you have that muscle memory, when you start by creating literally on your feet, that's going to build confidence because you're not thinking anymore. "Oh my gosh, I hope I remember what I typed." Because you've created it from the very moment you started on your feet. You have the confidence going in front of a mock jury that you do know it. And notice I didn't say remember it because when we're creating it on our feet, we are not memorizing. There's a few things, and I'll talk about that later in the podcast that we do memorize, but what I've always said to everybody is that you know your case so well that you could talk about it for hours if need be, right? In fact, I need to shut you down sometimes when we first start trial consulting because you're like there's this and this and this and I'm like, hold on, let's talk about what we're trying to actually fix here.

You know your case, all we're doing is fitting it into this template and when you're on your feet, that creates confidence that you know the template. There's a reason why nearly everybody, I don't know that we've ever had anybody actually, so I'm going to say a hundred percent of people leave trial lab or working with me here in front of a mock jury and they say nearly every time "I could do this on Monday morning, I could try this case on Monday morning in terms of the voir dire or the opening that we've created because they're so confident after they have done it in front of a jury on their feet because we don't create it ever behind a laptop. From the very moment we start and we start very early in H2H, six, nine months ahead of time, not the weekend before. They know that thing inside and out and it comes out differently every single time, but they know it and they can do it and there's confidence in that.

So many people come to me and they want to learn all the cool nonverbal shit. You're a nonverbal expert, Sari, and I am. But here's the thing, you cannot do the cool nonverbal shit if you're tripping over your content, which is why oftentimes when they're out here they're like, oh my god, there's so much I need to remember. I'm like, you don't need to remember any of this. You can remember what you remember. What I want you to do is just talk about your case. If anything, you just need to remember the template. All right, so if you're buying it that you're more creative on your feet and creating muscle memory from the start is going to help you remember what you need to remember and that doing it on your feet creates confidence. You may be wondering, well how do I do this Sari, like what am I supposed to be doing exactly?

All right, so here's where I have the five things. That's why I got confused. First thing is kind of like what I said, but I'm going to add a piece to it before, which is step one, stand up and get ready to get awkward. It is going to be weird at first. Just stand up, especially if you're by yourself in your office and start creating your opening by just talking out loud. And by the way, you do need to talk out loud. You're not just standing up and doing it in your head. I suggest that you start, if you're using the H2H template with the hook, just try on some hooks, right? So just try on hospitals that must monitor patients while under anesthesia, right. Just try on a hook and you're like, I don't love that. Let me change this word, let me change that word and you're not furiously scribbling notes, although I will say that you can use notes in this particular way, that's step number two.

But you're trying it on, you're seeing what it sounds like, oftentimes. Have you ever done this? I have because I wrote a book, I'm not sure if you've read it's called From Hostage the Hero. But when I wrote the book, what I did is I read everything I wrote out loud before it actually went to the publisher. And I'll tell you right now, I changed so many things just from reading it out loud, and that's not even to say that anyone would ever read it out loud, although a lot of people do want me to do an audio version, but I wouldn't say the book is completely out of date. There's so much good stuff in there, but it doesn't have the funnel and all that stuff, so I'm like, I'm not going to spend time doing that. Anyway, here you're going to say it out loud, it's never going to be read hopefully.

So you want to try it out loud. You might think that something you type behind a laptop is genius, but until you hear it out loud, you don't know. So just start trying it on and then you're going to move to your teaching and you're going to say, okay, there are three things that you need to know. People, how do I create my teaching section? I said, what's your case about? Well, it's about this particular birth injury. I say, how do you avoid it? How do doctors avoid having that birth injury happen in those cases, let's say it's shoulder dystocia or something like that. And they're like, well, what they need to do are these three things. Great, stand up, teach me. And they're like, what, I didn't write. I don't want you to write anything down. Just teach me the three things. And they're like, oh, okay, well doctors should. And boom, here we are creating our teaching section.

That's what I mean when I'm talking about just doing it. If you need an audience, bring them in, if that makes more sense. I love the collaboration piece and that's going to be coming up in step four. But if you want to just try it on your own at first, stand up and this is so important. Welcome the awkwardness. It's going to feel weird. It feels weird when I do it. I don't do that that often anymore, but when I was creating keynotes or when I'm creating a new keynote, I will often do it. All right, step number two, use flip charts. This is where you can take notes. And I don't mean teeny notes. I mean if you are like, this is how I work, by the way, if you come out and you work with me and I'm like, try out a hook on me, and they're like, bam.

And I'm like, let's change this word. Okay, try that one again. They're like, boom. And I'm like, let's try this one other thing. And they're like ba-doom, I had to come up with a different one. I'm like, yes, that's it. We'll write it out on the flip chart in big letters. And that's how we work throughout the whole day. We're just grabbing shit on flip charts. Now the reason why I want you to use flip charts and not typing is one, we're not doing word for word except for a few things, which I'll talk about in a minute. And two, when you're doing it on your own, you're handwriting it. And there's lots of research that shows when you hand write something that in itself is a form of muscle memory. It's very different from typing. And the third reason is that you can then use those flip charts to put all around your office to help you jog your memories.

You're standing up and you're like, oh, that's right. I want to talk about that. Again, not word for word. It's a little phrase. It's one single word or three single words for your teaching section. It's just to remind you here and there. Not to mention, I want you using flip charts in your opening statement. I have a whole podcast on why, so go to our website and look it up. But I love flip charts in opening. All right, number three, I want you to videotape yourself. Lots of times people are like that, but I'm going to forget all the good things, especially if I'm doing it by myself. Great. Open up your iPad and set it on your desk and videotape it so that you don't forget, right? Some of the great things that you did. But the main reason that I want you to videotape it is because I want you to get intimately aware of yourself.

That sounds really gross and sexual. Here's what I need. I want you to get intimately aware of how you're communicating non-verbally. One of the things people ask me all the time as well is how do I become really excellent in terms of presentation skills or non-verbal communication or reading juries or reading other people? I say your first step is to know what you are doing non-verbally. Once you know what you are doing non-verbally, then you can look at what other people are doing non-verbally. And once you know what other people are doing non-verbally, then you can start looking at groups. And now we're into group dynamics, but you can't skip the first step, which is what are you doing? And I will preface this by saying, because I videotaped probably the first five years of everything I ever did on stage to make sure that I could fix what I was doing and be purposeful.

So I will tell you here, just like step one was awkward. Step three, videotaping. You will be horrified. You'll be, what am I doing with this hand and why am I picking at that and why am I flipping my hair in this way? And oh my God, I picked my nose. God, I hope you don't pick your nose, but it's a great way to find out. So videotape that shit. Number four, which I already previewed, collaborated. Yes, you should start or may have, you don't have to. I wouldn't even say I should. Yes, you can start by yourself if you want to. For me, I love starting with collaboration and then I focus on my own. I need to do the nitty-gritty work myself. For some people, it's the opposite. Some people they're like, I want to start by myself and then I want to collaborate once I have some structure under my feet.

But when you are just you in your case, you're too close to it. So it's going to be really helpful for you to eventually either at the beginning or a little later, bring in your paralegal or your associates or just your family or whatever and have them get some eyes on what you're doing. That's going to give you so much great information. This is why the H2H crew, the H2H playground exists so that we can collaborate together on our cases. We are so much better together and we create our openings together on our feet. In fact, if you come into a call, I'm about to go into presentation skills here in just a minute, our presentation skills coaching, and I see you looking off to the side. I know you got notes up. I'm like, you don't need those. Come on, look at me, you can talk about your case.

Collaborate, get this in front of some eyes earlier is better than later. Even if you don't want to start that way. Don't wait until you feel like you've got it all the way done and then you get it in front of somebody. I wouldn't wait. Get in early either at the very beginning or somewhat early. Number five, practice, practice, and then practice some more. Listen, at first you're going to be creating and grabbing some flip chart notes and then you're going to be creating some more. And then you're going to be, oh no, I want to move that around, then you're going to create some more. And you've got flip charts all over and it looks like a beautiful mind in your office, which is great. That's not how you're doing it right when you've been doing that. But once you feel like you've kind of had it, I want you to practice and not word for word.

We don't memorize here at H2H except for a few things. We tend to memorize the hook, which if you know my template happens in a varied form three times in our opening, so that will pretty much be memorized. And we tend to memorize, you don't have to, but we tend to memorize transitions just so we know how to get from one section to the next. Luckily, my template's only nine pieces, so we also memorize that, right? So you know where you're going, but that's about it. Your opening should sound a little different every time. Pretty much the same, but it's like it should sound like you're just talking about something you're passionate about. Nobody wants to listen to a speech, nobody. You want to know how to sound conversational and like you know what the hell you're talking about. Do this over and over again until you could get it exactly and you could do it any day.

Do it right now. Great, and you stand up and do it. Again, not word for word. We're not memorizing, we're just getting so comfortable with the content that we can talk about it in just a variety of ways and be confident in it. Now, if you do want to memorize the structure, one of the things, and I think I've talked about this in a previous podcast, but one my favorite, I don't know where I got it from, but one of my favorite memorization techniques is the moving from room to room in your house. Also, you're standing. So for example, our first piece of the template is the hook. So maybe you're in your living room and you deliver the hook and then you walk into your hallway and you teach, and then you go into the guest bedroom and you do your defendant's story. And then you go into the bathroom and you're like, here's why we're here.

And the great thing about that is you're creating this neural pathway so that when you're actually doing it in trial, you are kind of walking through your house as you remember the template. Now, if you practice, practice, practice, you probably don't need that. But let's say that you didn't have enough time and you're just starting this two weeks before trial and you need a quick way to memorize the template that might assist you. Now, if you're like, sorry, how can I memorize a two and a half hour opening? Like what you're suggesting or practice not memorize, how can I practice a two and a half hour opening? You shouldn't have a two and a half hour opening. Here at H2H our openings are 30 minutes or less. Yes, some have gone to 41 minutes, I think with Nick and Shauna, I allowed it. I'm not going to sneeze at 20 million [inaudible 00:26:16], but that's why when it's 30 minutes or less, this is fucking easy to do.

And also when it's 30 minutes or less, you're communicating to the jury that this is really not a complicated scenario. Here's what happened and here's what you need to do to fix it, booyah. Two and a half hours says, this is so complicated and complex, it's going to take me two and a half hours to teach you about it. You don't want to do that. All right, how do you get off notes? Don't make them in the first place. If you're anything like my masterminds, after that trial lab, they all came out of that going, sorry, you said that to us for nine or eight months, and I'm not sure I totally believed you. And now I am sold. And everybody who's ever been out here says the same thing. This is the way to confidence not typing out every single word. See you next week.